One of our activities was a day trip to the beach. Doodle and sand, don't get along. As I stood in the breaking surf, with 22 pounds of whiney toddler clinging to my body, I watched my friend Princess and her daughter Free Spirit frolicking in the waves. Seriously, they frolicked! I have to be honest, I was a little jealous. I love the ocean and wanted to have that moment with Doodle. The more I watched Free Spirit loving everything about the beach, the more I wanted Doodle to like the beach.
Frustrated by her clinging, we left the water and went to have snacks (even that didn't make the beach better for my little one). As we snacked Princess and I were talking. She stares in disbelief at the brave/carefree attitude of her eldest child. Princess is on constant alert for anything sparkly that might cause Free Spirit to dart in an unexpected direction. Princess is by no means shy, but she is a little reserved and likes to take things in before jumping in feet first. She is sometimes perplexed by Free Spirit's running leaps into the world. I confess to Princess that I always thought I would have a kid like Free Spirit. My mother always tells people that I suck in the whole world and spit out what I don't like. I thought I would have that kid. Instead, I have a kid who thinks about the world, turns her back on the world, thinks about it some more and then puts her big toe in the water. I have struggled with this huge difference in our personalities. I have forced my self to admit that Doodle is a "slow to warm up" kid. I say that like it is a disease. I know it is not. But it took some getting used to on my end. She needs time to adjust to new people, places, situations, and experiences.
As Princess ran in to the ocean after Free Spirit, I reminded my self that Doodle is "slow to warm up", not "never warms up". So, taking a note from Free Spirit I drug my slow to warm up toddler back down to the edge of the water. But, this time I remembered who I had in my arms and I sat in the breaking waves and held my sweet child. She layed her head on my chest and clung to me, still slightly afraid I might wiggle away from her. She squirmed on my lap, refusing to let her feet get near the water, and grinding sand deep into the skin of my thighs. I kept reassuring her. Soon, her feet were in the water, and she was telling me "dat was a BIIIIG wave mommy". A little while later, she turned around to look at the water. By the end of an hour, my lower body was deeply exfoliated from all the sand being smushed between our bodies, and Doodle got off of my lap and walked into the water on her own. Of course by this time our 4 little companions (we left one at home) had decided they were done with the beach and it was time to go.
As I look back on that morning, I have in my mind the most beautiful picture of me (super model skinny and beautiful of course) holding my child in the edge of the surf. The gritty sand is forgotten for a moment, and I remember how wonderful it was to snuggle that little Doodle. It might not have been the moment I expected to share with her, but I will remember it for summers to come. I hope I will also remember the lesson I learned from Doodle and Free Spirit. I hope I will remember that Doodle is her own person and I need to go with it more and let her take the lead, even if it is a slower, more round about way to get somewhere.
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| No cameras were brought to the beach (we thought 5 kids and all their crap was enough to keep up with), but I did find this picture that pretty much sums up my kid. Standing in the sprinkler thinking about weather or not she likes it! |
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